Optimist Prime

My sister sent this to me and I love it.  It reminds me of my favorite boys and my friend Melissa who is teaching me about positive thoughts.  It also helps me remember my goal to think positively.  It's been something I've been focusing on for a while now.  I am beginning to realize that this affects me more than I even know.  This little picture also is a perfect example of the people I have looking out for me all the time.  My sister always sends me little things like this, or links to shoes she thinks I might like, the list goes on.  I think I have a little army of people sent to look out for me.  Just the other day my friend sent over the sweetest little gift that brightened my day and made me feel special when I most needed it.  How did she know?  I am being looked out for.  

I know it shouldn't affect me so much, but the last few years have been rough for me regarding infertility and babies.  The silly thing is, I know WAY more people have it WAY worse than me.  I know that.  But it is hard for me none-the-less.  It's time to shift my focus.  I am giving up--in the sense that I can't worry about it any more.  I feel like I've missed out on too much with my other kids because I've been worrying about this too much.  How did I not know that Hal calls broccoli 'sparkly'?  I should have known that.  I think I've been self-medicating with books (and shopping, but we won't go there.  Right, Mike?).  I read 5 books last week--and they weren't little books.  I think my kids got away with too much this week because I was trying to finish my chapter.  The key is moderation...

I am getting so excited for Summer.  I want this summer to be about watermelon and crunchy carrots. I can't wait to plant a garden again.  I want to go for bike rides to the park and take a picnic.  I want to eat popsicles everyday and listen to the sprinklers.  I want to not care when Savanna comes up dressed in mismatched clothes that she wore 2 days ago.  I will be proud of her for dressing herself.  I am going to care less if the house is clean if it means I am playing with the kids.  This is going to be nearly impossible for me, but it is a goal.  I am actually hoping we'll be outside so much the inside will stay clean.   I think they hear me tell them to pick up the bonus room as much as I say something nice to them.  That's not how it should be.  I need to be their biggest supporter.   I feel strongly that my job is to teach my kids.  That is MY job and I will be held accountable for it.   I need to be better. 

My plans for ME include getting in shape.  I have been doing ok, but I can do better.  I also have a list of things I would like to learn about.  I loved being in school.  I love learning.  If I didn't have to pay for it and take tests, I would be in school for the rest of my life.  I like knowing stuff about lots of different topics.  I love writing talks for church because then I learn a lot about the topic.  I just don't love GIVING the talk.  So, if you have an interesting topic for me to add to my list then drop me a line.  I also want to cook as many meals as I can outside and visit my grandparents weekly.  Should be fun.    

That's what's up.  Here's to a wonderful Spring and spontaneous Summer!

And just for the heck of it, a picture of Carter playing soccer in the spring with NO RAIN.  A small miracle.  Incidentally, Carter also scored a goal in this game and we didn't believe him.  We had to ask his coach.  He said he told the other team, "You want a piece of me?" and then went on to explain that it means you're gonna do something to them.  Then he giggled.  Oh dear.  How do you not laugh?